• Maria Hastings

It's important to see the humour in everything & whatever you do, don't move.

When I went along for my #breast #needle #biopsy I didn't really know what to expect . I'd guessed there would be #needles & a bit of #discomfort, but apart from that I was walking into the unknown.

To prepare myself I'd started to investigate #meditation. A friend of mine had an interest in #holistic #medicine and #healing and we'd had a few sessions round his house lighting #candles , concentrating on #positivity & with me silently praying that whatever was going on inside me would go away. With every session I felt #calmer so by the time appointment day came around I was as ready as I could be .

During a breast needle biopsy a selection of #cells, #tissues and #fluid are taken so they can be #examined under a #microscope to determine what is going on .

Some details of the day are hazy but I can remember some of it. My breast was clamped carefully into position & I was told to sit as still as possible . There were around 4 or 5 people in the room with me , radiographers, needle -biopsy-needle-punching people, & nurses . When we were all ready someone came up to me and turned and tilted my head to a highly uncomfortable position & I was told Not To Move . (Think chicken, neck, wrung, 90 degrees & my nose pointed towards 11 o'clock ) 'don't move' - as if...

It sounds comical to write this but each time a needle went in the number was counted out loud - number 1, number2, number 3 . (Did they do this just in case they forgot which number they were at? ' - don't worry, I'm still here & I won't forget)

Meditation was good for me , it took me to a place - 'my happy place' which was basically anywhere I wanted it to be.

I was on a beach in Thailand . My husband, children & me were all playing beach volley ball, it was warm and sunny, life was good

Number 8, number 9....

~ I can feel the warm sand on my feet . I'm wearing a bikini; I look down at my chest to study my bikini top, it is pink and purple.....~

I'm instantly catapulted into the Here and Now, and I just have time to say 'I don't feel well, I think I'm falling....'

When I come around I'm lying on the floor surrounded by everyone else in the room, my legs are being held above my head, my skirt is around my waist , I'm sweating profusely , feeling dazed & I apologise for what has happened. Everyone is looking concerned & I'm told not to worry and that usually patients don't give any warning before they #faint & they thank me for giving them a heads up.

Phew; it's good to hear I'm not the only one to hit the floor.

I'm given the option to go and lie down ; have a cup of tea, and ask my hubby to come & collect me and to make another appointment so all the biopsies needed can be done at a later date.

I ask what the best thing to be done is & I'm told ideally they would like to carry on doing the biopsies today until they have everything they need .

I tell them I'm happy to stay and that they should carry on . I'm told I can lie down whilst I have the next biopsies done.

......Number 19, Number 20, and number 21 .

By this time I've been in the examination room for over 2 hours .

Once everything has been done I have a quick cup of coffee and then drive myself back home . I don't remember driving back but I got home safe.

I walk through the door to find my husband in the middle of some DIY . He asks how it all went and I say 'fine'; he then asks me to climb up a ladder and hold something whilst he fixes some lighting to the ceiling . Without a second's thought I start climbing , still feeling wobbly from this afternoon's antics . I'm glad when I can come back down & rest.

It's over a year later before I tell him about that afternoon at the hospital.

~ Note to myself - always give warning when you're about to embarrass yourself, to give yourself the best chance of falling with grace.

~ Second Note to myself - always wear good knickers .